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The Grinch that stole Thanksgiving

It’s that time of year again.

Last year I went on record stating that Thanksgiving was my least favorite holiday. That is an understatement. I am clearly not a fan.

I’m also not a fan of turkey, cranberries, stuffing, overeating, and spending hours cooking and cleaning.

All of this explains a lot about my resistance towards a holiday that celebrates a man that took a piece of country away from the native inhabitants and claimed it for his own.

Thanksgiving snuck up on me this year. And while I know it’s a time of year to be grateful for our blessings, the thing is, sometimes I don’t feel very grateful. Sometimes I just feel tired, annoyed, and maybe a tad bit lost. Life can be exhausting.

There seems to be so much to worry about this time around. The violence in the Middle East, rampant unemployment, our country’s fiscal uncertainty, illness, loss, and let us not forget the impending doom that the Mayan’s scripted for us by ending our calendar on December 21st (Thanks for nothing, Mayans!).

Yes, I’m feeling a bit grumpy this year.

What I’d really like to do this Thanksgiving is retreat to a quiet vineyard, take a good book, a good man (not necessarily in that order), and my dog, and lay low for the weekend enjoying the countryside, the wine and the people. No muss, no fuss; just quiet sleep-in mornings, musical late night evenings and days of daydreaming of things to come and the planning of future adventures. That is not, however, how I will be spending the holiday.

The wonderful man in my life somehow convinced me to host the holiday at home for a few choice friends and family, a tradition he values greatly. I’m not sure exactly how it all happened, but before you could say ‘Christopher Columbus’, I was menu planning.

A diabolical turn of events and a far cry from my Thanksgiving ritual of ordering oodles of Chinese food, watching old movies in my pajamas and playing board games by the fire (a tradition I miss already). While I am always pleased as punch to hookup with these awesome people, the jury is still out as to whether I can be recruited into the Thanksgiving spirit.

Feeling more like the Grinch than a thankful pilgrim, I will work on ridding myself of this turkey size chip on my shoulder and focus deeply on those things that I am fortunate enough to enjoy in my life; the love of a good man, a loving family, two good-for-nothing cats and a bossy dog, wonderful friends, a pantry full of food and a warm and welcoming home to house it all in. I would add to that list; a bright future, but I guess we’ll have to wait until December 22nd to see if that one is true. (stupid Mayans!)

We no longer live in the Norman Rockwell world of Thanksgiving. There are as many different ways to celebrate Thanksgiving as there are people. Families morph, people move away, kids grow up, and some of us meet and fall in love with people that don’t value the Chinese food idea of Thanksgiving (I’m not mentioning names).

All in all, however you celebrate this holiday, I hope that you do just that; celebrate! And I hope that you do it in peace, warmth and love.

Of course Chinese food wouldn’t hurt either.


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Linda Robertson - Tammy, you crack me up! I’m so enjoying your emails. I write what I call “inspirational humor” and also “black and blue” humor…that one’s when you’ve been beaten down but you come back fighting…actually, they’re both kind of the same now that I think of it. And I too, have been compared to the irrepressible and wonderful Erma. How could anything be more awesome than that?

Keep those literary gems coming and know that I’m a big fan of yours…also, you can check out my blog: for my take on the world!

Thanks for spreading the joy through your insight, words, and humor.


Carol - You are truly “witty”! Love your insight and humor in putting
On paper what I think so many of us are thinking
silently to ourselves! Chinese food and pj’s sounds good to

Joan Cooper - I love the “vineyard” solution. Me too me too.

My least favorite holiday is Halloween. All those scary things – what is that to celebrate? I am not big on holiday type things – for me the challenge is living everyday. I especially do not like to celebrate birthdays!!!!!!!!!!

Carry on, Tammy.

Joan Cooper

Suerae Stein - I love the Chinese food idea! I have to say that it is not my favorite holiday either, although I do like the idea of a day focused on food! It is something I find myself thinking about often – haha! I love your blog and hope that you find much joy in your non-Chinese-food-Thanksgiving. The vineyard idea sounds even better than the Chinese food!

Tammy - Hi Linda, I’m always happy to meet a new fan and happy to throw my own adoration your way. Humor is a way of life for me (as you can tell), as I have not found any better way to get through the day. My daughter would always tell me that I’m a party all by myself. I will indeed check out your blog and am wondering why it is not tagged in your response as I have accommodated my fellow bloggers by giving them an automatic link to their latest post. Next time you post (I am hopeful there will be a next time), use your blog address to post from and it will happen automatically for you. In the meantime, enjoy this goofy holiday as I send a big Erma hug your way!

Tammy - Hi Carol, I often wonder if I’m the only one that thinks “that way”. Few peeps ever speak out about stuff like this. But you know, I couldn’t hold it in if I tried. Yes, Chinese food and Jammies is the ultimate way to do anything (in my humble opinion). Hopefully next year! Have a most wonderful holiday, however you choose to spend it. Thanks ever so for the read and the post!

Tammy - Hi Joan, YES, the vineyard solution is absolutely heavenly. Unfortunately, I’m the only one in the relationship that thinks so. (sad face) I, too, love celebrating birthdays, especially if they are at a spa that requires me to dress in a white fluffy robe and get pampered all day with massages, facials, steams and pedi’s, while being fed grapes and chocolate by Pablo. But I digress. A very happy turkey holiday to you! I appreciate hearing from you, Joan, and yes, I will indeed carry on!

Tammy - Hi Suerae, Finally! Some one else who doesn’t cherish Thanksgiving. Awesome! That now makes two of us. I am going out on the traditional limb this year (kicking and screaming) and can only hope for the best. Thanks so much for being here…I love that you love the blog, and I can tell you, that the writer loves you right back! I’m thinking next year I should organize a trip for all who want to spend Thanksgiving at a vineyard. Just a thought. Best wishes to you and your family for a warm and happy holiday! Great hearing from you!!

Susan S - Ahhhhh, blessings rejoice ! To be with loved ones, and I will….that’s what it’s all about. A dear friend once told me that Thanksgiving is “just a meal”….nah…it’s the joy of being with those we care about…laughing, catching up with those that we don’t see enough, and yes enjoying the turkey, stuffing, and of course the pumpkin pie….it’s the calories we don’t need, but the love that surrounds us that we do need. Life is way too short….enjoy and yes, blessings do follow. Love to you, dear Tammy….x

Malissa - They have pills for that! 🙂

Nancy Wurtzel - Tammy, I love your take on a holiday that can really get out of hand! I’m more of a Chinese person on Christmas (having been married to a Jewish man for 21 years), but I might opt for Japanese for Thanksgiving…actually that sounds pretty wonderful. Anyway, you are very nice to host the day with your significant other. All the best to you — and keep these great posts coming! Hugs, Nancy

SUE COVE - Happy Turkey Day from sunny and warm Colorado!! Wish there was snow and then I can sing that song…..Over the River and Through the woods…to grandmothers house we go…..oh those were the best Turkey Days! I am thankful for those memories! You enjoy!!!

Tammy - Hi Susan, oh my, you sound so full of gratitude and good tidings! Yes, yes, I know you’re right, it’s not just another meal … it’s a boat load of work kind of meal. Just saying. Clearly you are blessed to have a loving family who gathers to share, play, eat and pray. Blessings to you, and yours, my friend. I’m all about the pumpkin pie and hope you have a piece in my honor. Life IS way too short, and so we must all go and enjoy this coming holiday in whatever manner best suits us. I will hold out for the vineyard next year, just in case you were wondering. Give that lovely family of yours a Tammy kind of hug and kisses all around. Being surrounded by love is the best way to spend any day!

Tammy - Hi Melissa, yes, but my preferred method of relief is Ben & Jerry’s chocolate brownie ice-cream. Works every time! Happy holiday to you!

Tammy - Hi Nancy, Japanese food on Thanksgiving?? Brilliant! I will keep it in mind for my hopeful excursion next year to the vineyards! I AM a nice person to host the Thanksgiving soiree, aren’t I? I hope I get points in heaven for the thought and the effort (you can never have enough points!). Although it won’t be much effort hanging with some of the nicest people on earth. My warmest thoughts go out to you and your family this holiday. Enjoy, and hugs right back at ya!!

Tammy - Hi Sue, you are entirely too cheerful but I think it’s what everyone loves about you (among other things). I miss Colorado, this time of year especially. Thanksgiving would always give us a little snow, crisp air and a lot of sunny blue skies and white puffy clouds. I won’t complain too much as I sit in beautiful California where it is currently 72 degrees. Not exactly a Rocky Mountain high, but pretty awesome in itself. Keep up that amazing energy, sing to your heart’s content and enjoy your turkey day with friends and family and accept my best wishes. Truth is a big part of me wishes I was spending the weekend in the Rockies, the vineyards be damned! Thanks, awfully for being here.

Malissa - LoL yumm, that would be better !

Laura Lee Carter aka the Midlife Crisis Queen - Nice Tammy! WE got ours over earlier this week and now we are laying low, much like you recommended. It feels like we got away with something…while everyone else stresses ou ton dinner, we are taking in some serious r & r.
Yum, yummy, yum, yum!

Tammy - Hi Laura Lee, you DID get away with something and I am uber envious. Damn good for you! You now have the best of both worlds. You clever little minx, you! So, while we are stressing it out, you are picking off the leftovers, sleeping in, watching movies and doing some reading and cuddling. Assumptions, I know, but hey, I am nothing if not pushy. I like it! Thanks for popping in. Always love having you. Enjoy your stress free weekend and think of the little people who are scurrying around trying to make it work (that would be me). A collective prayer for calm and a good sense of humor can’t hurt.

Mel Glenn - Have a good holiday and make the best of it. I am sure you will feel grateful for all that you DO have. Living on the east coast and surviving the worst of Hurricane Sandy makes me feel lucky and grateful.

Kellie - Dear friend
I hope you find peace and joy this thanksgiving. Often times we bring our old baggage of our past to the present day holidays. Throw away the past and see it as new adventure with new BF and friends. It maybe surprising. Create new memories…

Tammy - Hi Mel, I imagine that thankfulness takes on a whole new meaning after surviving Sandy. There are no words to comfort such devastation. You are right, my friend, I do feel grateful for all that I have and I WILL make the best of it. Someday I would like to meet you in person and we can compare notes on life, liberty and the art of survival. It should make for an interesting afternoon, don’t you think? Until then, continue to feel grateful for all you have, as I suspect you are worthy of every single bit of it. Happy holiday to you and your family.

Tammy - Hi Kellie, well, I am well known for my baggage and the ability to leave it at the door. Past holidays still haunt me, though, in a way I don’t often admit. Throwing away the past is not so easily done. But living in the ‘now’ is something I am good at. Being present, being aware and being grateful is something I practice every day. Thank you for reminding me that I have a “Do Over” life. I’ve worked very hard for it and deserve its grace and its blessings. Creating new memories is my newest state of mind. But hanging on to some of the old ones is still something I value. It’s all a balance, something I often share with my favorite readers. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and advice. Both are always welcome here! Happiest of holiday to you and your family.

Pamela O'Mack - Hi Tammy, it’s not often that I disagree with you, but this time I do. Thanksgiving Day is a day of giving thanks, which can be a variety of things. I’m thankful for every day I wake up, especially after my recent bout in the hospital, my loving daughter and wonderful boyfriend, most of my relatives, my wonderful friends, a roof over my head and food to eat. I’m sure there are many other things that I have forgotton, but when I look at the pictures of people lined up for food and have no heat after Hurricane Sandy, and hearing their positive attitudes, I feel very humbled and grateful for what I have. I hope you enjoy tomorrow with wonderful Steven and the rest of the people you are cooking for and have fun and be your wonderful happy, loving, funny and perky self! Happy turkey day!!! Love, Pamela

Tammy - Hi Pamela, I stand corrected…and humbled. You are of course, very right; there is much for a grateful heart to celebrate. I, like you, am a lucky girl in more ways than I can count. Once in a while life gets me a bit down, a bit hurried, a bit overwhelmed and a bit annoyed. But in the big scheme of things I am a girl that knows what I have and celebrates having it. I WILL spend tomorrow with great friends and my Steven and send blessings to the wonderful people that I am fortunate to have in my life … such as you. As for being my happy, loving, funny perky self … well, I’ll have to get back to you on that. Have a happy, restful and loving day of thanks. I’m so happy (and grateful) to have you here!

Maureen - Hope your T’giving dinner turned out wonderful!

Stacey Joy - Ohhhh how I love thee!!! I detest turkey, dressing, SOUL FOOD (and I am African-American), and sweet potato pie is gross but I can make a really delicious pie for the hubby!! I’m no one’s favorite person on Turkey Day and I’ve never cared! The year I brought PF Chang’s take-out as my contribution, everyone resolved to letting me be me!!

Tammy, I commend you for being cooperative with your guy and the planning! You’re a good person!

Great post!

Tammy - Stacey, well, my dear, you and I might be alone in this category. That’s fine by me! I understand completely how you feel, and am grateful for you that you have family and friends that are happy to let you … be you. I’m not necessarily a good person. All right, .. yes I am. Haa! I’m just racking up points so that next year will be a pajama day filled with moo-shoo pork and sweet and sour chicken. Now THAT’S a holiday! I think this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship. Love your posts!

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